Praying the Rosary as a Family... with 18 People
They have 16 children and are from North Carolina, and if there's one thing Conor and Ashley Gallagher know you can do with 16 children, it's praying as a family, finding order in the chaos, and that there will always be excuses to avoid the customs of prayer.
In their case, the rosary often includes their two-year-old son biting the beads and older children fighting for a spot on the couch, while several children in between beg to lead a mystery even though they don't know the Lord's Prayer by heart.
"It's adorable, but I also want to go to bed," Gallagher says, adding that the image also reflects "one of the most peaceful nights."
The normal thing for them, trying to pray at a time when all family members can be together, is to pray while some are finishing their homework, trying to elevate their prayers above the sound of the vacuum cleaner, or even holding a phone so that one of the children on the way home can join in the family prayer.
“The reality is that our house is not a monastery. We are not holy monks and nuns, we are a family. And what I've discovered is that, even when piety is lacking, even when distractions mount, we stay together, we still pray to our Heavenly Father,” Conor emphasizes.
Gallagher is the author of several books, including the recently published Raising Blue-Collar Kids in a White-Collar World, which offers ways for Catholic parents to raise their children with “courage and grace.”
Being Catholic is no easy task, he says, and if your child wants to practice their faith as an adult, then they must learn to be selfless, work hard, and, as they practice every day at home, persevere.
An education in effort and work from childhood also contributes, according to his experience, to acquiring "the determination to endure the struggles of daily life." And especially, to doing so "in a virtuous, charitable, and humble manner," for the holy person "knows how to suffer, endure trials and tribulations. Achieving virtue is a difficult task, and self-denial is a prerequisite. Carrying one's own cross is quite typical of the working class."
For some reason, family prayer can be difficult. Carving out time in a day and gathering everyone into the same room seems particularly hard. It was hard when my wife Ashley and I had only three kids. It seems perfectly impossible now with sixteen. But even in the face of the difficulties, we still manage to gather and pray, no matter what
Set Reasonable Goals
We tried morning prayer years ago. As the kids were eating breakfast and I was ready to head out the door for work, we would all pause there in the kitchen and pray the Angelus. It was a great way to begin the day and was important for my children to see the last thing their father did before leaving for the day was praying with them. Come to think of it, I’m going to start this up again.
But as the kids get older and schedules get busier, we’ve altered our prayer time to an evening Rosary. My wife and I set a goal of praying all together four times per week, and most weeks we hit our mark. You might ask, “Why only four times a week?” It’s because it’s an attainable goal. With everyone coming and going, seven nights just simply won’t happen. We wanted a reasonable goal that we could actually hit and not get discouraged if we didn’t, but even then, it’s hardly a pretty picture.What Does Family Prayer Look Like? A Father Of …