‘SELECTED WRITINGS’ – Saint Hildegard of Bingen; Translated by Mark Atherton – ‘STRUGGLES FOR INDEPENDENCE’; pages 96-98, points 1-2; ‘The Trials of the Soul (from Scivias I, 4)…’
[Saint HILDEGARD OF BINGEN ~ XI-XII Century AD; born: Bermersheim, Holy Roman Empire/died: Bingen am Rhein, Holy Roman Empire, aged 81; Abbess, Polymath, Writer, Composer, Mystic, Visionary, Philosopher, Medical Writer and Practitioner, Composer of Sacred Monophony, Virgin, Founder, Doctor of the Church]10. The Trials of the Soul (from Scivias I, 4)
[The first few chapters of Scivias I, 4, form a separate section prior to a discussion of the physiology of human conception and Church teachings on marriage. Two of the chapter titles describe the text as ‘the lament of the soul on the path of error but returning through the grace of God to her mother Zion’ (eh. 1) and ‘the wings of the soul’ (eh. 2), both of which give some indication of the theme. It is tempting to see a link between the spiritual states symbolized in this story and Hildegard’s own tribulations as she gradually gained recognition as a writer and spiritual leader. She returned to a similar plot for her drama of Anima (Soul) in the Play of the Virtues (13). The theme of the runaway daughter is also of interest, for it links the story to the later departures Of Richardis and Adelheid (12).
The accompanying illustration in the Rupertsberg manuscript shows, in its mainframe, a golden light pouring life into a woman’s womb. To the right of the larger picture is a vertical row of five smaller framed pictures depicting the soul in her tent, the soul threatened by a torrent of waters on a mountain peak, the soul afflicted by scorpion creatures, the soul in a wine-press, and the soul being led out to eat with pigs. All of these scenes form part of the symbolic drama of the soul as told in the text here.]
1-2. The lament of the soul
Where am I in my exile? In the shadow of death. What is this path I am walking on? The path of error. And what comfort do I have? The comfort of pilgrims.
I was to have had a tent, a tabernacle decorated with five square stones that shone brighter than the sun and the stars. And the stones were to shine not with the rising sun and stars but with the glory of the angels. Its foundations were to be topaz, with gemstones for its roof and walls. Its steps were to be covered with crystal and its streets paved with gold. I was to be the companion of angels!
For I am the living breath which God breathed into the dry dust of the earth. And so I was to know God and to feel God.
But what misfortune! When the tent of my body realized that it could cast its eyes in all directions it pitched itself towards the north. Abomination! There I was captured and robbed of my sight and joy of knowledge. All my garments were torn to shreds!
And so I was drummed out of my inheritance. My captors dragged me to this place of exile without beauty or honour. They threw me into slavery. They beat me with their fists and made me eat with the pigs. They sent me to a desert place and gave me bitter herbs to eat dipped in honey. Then they laid me in a wine-press and subjected me to many torments. They pulled off my clothes, striking me with many blows and sending me out to hunt.
And I was made to catch all manner of evil and venomous worms, like scorpions and vipers, which sprayed me all over with their poison till I sickened with weakness. They mocked me then and said, ‘Where is your honour now?’
I trembled all over, groaning in my misery, and I said: Where am I? Oh where have I come from? What comfort can I look for in this captivity? How can I break these chains? What eye can see my wounds and what nostrils can bear the stench of this affliction? What hand can anoint my wounds with oil? Who will ever show me mercy in my pain?
May Heaven hear my cry! May the Earth tremble at my misery and all that live on her have pity for my captivity! I am oppressed by bitter pains, for I am a pilgrim without comfort or support. Who will console me, for my mother has left me because I strayed from the way of salvation. None will help me but God!
Oh Zion, my mother, when I remember how I would have dwelt with you, then I look at this bitter captivity into which I have been thrown! And when I recall all the harmonies of music9 within you, then I can only consider my wounds. And when I remember the joys and delights of your glory, then I curse these poisons with which they are polluted.
Where shall I turn? Where shall I run to? My pain is immeasurable, since if I remain in this evil plight, I will be a companion to them - the ones I knew shamefully in the country of Babylon. Where are you, Zion my mother? What misfortune! If only I had not left you! I could bear this pain more easily if I did not know you.
Now I shall flee these evil companions! Wretched Babylon has loaded me with weights of lead; she oppresses me with heavy timbers so that I can scarcely breathe. But when I cry out to you, my mother, in my tears, wretched Babylon pours forth a crashing sound of rushing waters so that you cannot hear my voice. In great trouble, therefore, I will seek the narrow ways. And so I will escape my evil companions and my miserable captivity!
When I had spoken these words, I ran down the narrow path and hid myself in a small cave towards the north, weeping bitterly since I had lost my mother. Here too I considered all my pain and all my wounds. Here I cried and wept, pouring out my tears so that all the pain and malice of my wounds were flooded with my tears.
Suddenly, a pleasant fragrance touched my nostrils, like a gentle breeze sent to me from my mother. What sighs I uttered and what tears I shed when I felt that modicum of comfort! I cried and wept such tears of joy that even the mountain was moved in whose cave I had hidden.
And I said, ‘O mother, mother Zion! What will become of me? Where is your noble daughter now? For how long, for how long will I be without your motherly tenderness, without the great delight and joy with which you bring me up?’ With these tears I was as glad as if I had actually seen my mother.
But my enemies heard my cries and said, ‘Where is our companion whom we have had until now to do everything we desired? Look how she calls on the citizens of heaven! Let us employ all our skills to guard her with great care and attention so that she cannot escape us! Remember we had her completely in our power! If we do this, then she will follow us again.’
But I slipped out quietly from the cave where I had been hiding. I aimed to climb so high that my enemies could not find me. But they released such a sea of raging water against me that there was no way I could get over it. There was a bridge, but it was so small and narrow that I could not cross it. And on the other shore of the sea the mountains were so tall and jagged that I could not journey there either. And I said, ‘What can a poor creature do now? For a little while I was able to feel the benevolent presence of my mother, and I thought she would lead me back to her. But now she has deserted me! Where am I to turn? If I turn back now to my former captivity, my enemies will mock me more than ever before! I cried to my mother in tears and felt her sweet presence, but now she has abandoned me again!’
But I had been given strength by the sweet comforting influence of my mother which I had felt before. So now I turned to the east and set out again on the narrow paths. The paths were so full of thorns and briars and other obstacles that I could hardly make any headway. Eventually, with much effort and stress, I made my way through, though almost breathless with exhaustion from my labours.
Tired and exhausted as I was, I at last reached the summit of the mountain in which I had previously hidden, and made my way towards a gully where I had to descend. But there I stopped and looked. Vipers, scorpions, lizards and various other species of reptile were hissing their tongues at me and blocking the way down!
‘Mother, where are you?’ I screamed in my terror. ‘I could have borne this pain more easily if I’d never felt your presence before. Now I’ll be thrown into captivity again where I was kept for so long! Where is your help now?’
It was then that I heard my mother’s voice speaking to me, ‘Run, my daughter, run, for you have been granted wings to fly with by the great Giver whom none can resist. Quickly, therefore, fly over all these creatures opposing you.’ And then, with a great feeling of comfort and release, I took up my wings and flew quickly over those venomous and death-dealing vipers.
Image: Saint Hildegard of Bingen ~ Liber Divinorum Operum, I-4, ‘Cosmos, Body, and Soul - The Word Made Flesh’, Lucca, MS, 1942 folio 38r